I have been to the NC Zoo many times over the last 20 years. At least twice a year on average.I like the zoo. Today, I learned how to let a chimpanzee know that I am friendly. And it really worked!SPOILER ALERT!You just drag your knuckles across the gl...

I've mentioned it before, but I loved being a DJ in college. But how could you not love it?I played music for everyone in a whopping eight-mile radius.I heard new music before anyone else. The Internet has put everyone on equal footing, but this used t...

I'm going to be taking the rest of the week off.In the meantime, I'm working on a project. A new site. And I'm looking for people to join me.If you are between the ages of 35-45, funny, and would like to write for me with me, drop me a line. ...

I spend a lot of time on Facebook.Unlike most people who use Facebook, I don't use it to connect, network, or anything like that. I use it to play Scrabble. If my laptop's on, there's a damn good chance that one of Firefox's tabs contains the following...

The four of us were in the grocery store when the following question echoed through the produce section, "Where do babies come from?"Oh hell, I thought. This is not the right time for this conversation.Actually, I don't have a clue when this conversati...

It's Self-Love Day!I participated two years ago, but last year I was busy showering a redneck.Anyway, Self-Love Day was created by Hilly at Snackiepoo as an alternative to Valentine's Day, a day when each participant could yell to the world something h...

Losing My Edge by LCD Soundsystem (me)Changes by David Bowie (me)Hey Nineteen by Steely Dan (Dereksmommissy)When You Were Young by The Killers (For A Different Kind Of Girl)Growing Old by Origin (Mr. Big Dubya)Glory Days by Bruce Springsteen (FlipFlops...

The problem with Top 40 radio is that it's so damn repetitive.Sure, you can listen to other formats, like alternative, country, classic rock, retro whatever, NPR, college radio, etc. You can listen to those channels that have a guy's name that like to ...

It's Cynical Dad Day!Yeah, whatever.So this morning didn't feel any different than any other. I woke up alive. No new aches and pains. And like James said, I didn't start craving Metamucil.So there's that.However, I'm still having a hard time dealing w...